Memorials for Anne Marie

About one year ago today (I think May 27), this corner of the blogosphere lost one of its prominent members. Anne Marie in Philly (aka Warrior Queen aka Carebear aka AM aka Anne Marie Gunther) died suddenly. Usually “died suddenly” is a polite euphemism for “committed suicide”, but I doubt that was the case here. I am not sure of the cause of death, and it is none of my business, but Anne Marie had been suffering poor health in the months leading up to her death, and my suspicion is that they led to a medical emergency.

Anne Marie was known for her political opinions, knitting, surviving cancer, surviving a bad first marriage, fierce loyalty to her ingroup, appreciation of hirsute ginger men, allyship to the LGBTQ+ community, and dainty ladylike demeanor. In addition to being a prolific commenter she had her own blog at From My Brain to My Mouth. Her sudden death shocked the community. Tributes to her rolled in. I have compiled the ones I know of in this post. No doubt I have missed several; if you know of others feel free to add them in the comments (but be aware that WordPress marks any comment with multiple links as spam, so you may want to put at most one link per comment).

Memorials are a funny thing. Some people get many memorials. Others get none. Memoraials tend to fade over time. I expect a few people will post about Anne Marie on this anniversary, but I expect that fewer will commemorate her next year. Four years from now many of our blogs will probably be defunct. Nine years from now I worry some of these bloggers will also be defunct (although I hope this is not the case). There is a platitude that says that Anne Marie is not gone so long as she is remembered, but that just delays the inevitable. We all fade away, and life goes on for those left behind. This is an artifact documenting that, at one point, Anne Marie was remembered.

This listing is not in any particular order, other than Todd’s entry.

Memorials Soon After Anne Marie Died

Todd at arteejee: Saturday Morning Post: To My Dearest Friend

John at Going Gently: Anne Marie

Ron at Retired in Delaware: Anne Marie of Philly Warrior Queen

1st Man at Two Men and a Little Farm: The Loss of Anne Marie in Philly

Dave at Riding On: Eternal

Maddie at A Day with the Mistress Borghese: Into the Fabulon

Urspo at Spo-Reflections: Threnody for a Warrior Queen

Bob at I Should Be Laughing: Goodbye My Friend

Debra at She Who Seeks: “Saturday Night Protest Party”

Jay at WickedHamster: Sadness

David at The Adventures of Travel Penguin: Sunday Sadness and Five Lessons

Jennifer at Sparrow Tree Journal: Saturday stuff

Sixpence at (Lo) Imprescindible: She Hated Nazis

Michael at My Secret Journey: I Have No Words for This, But I’ll Try

Sean at Idle Eyes and A Dormy: A smaller world and Mournings are hard

JM at Open a Window: So Shines A Good Deed

Robzilla at I Hit Midlife, Is This My Crisis?: A Saturday Night Wake/Dance Party

Mr Shife at Confessions of a Dumb, White Guy: Random Acts of Shifeness – June Updates

Fearsome and Shawn at Fearsome Beard wrote many tributes over the year. Some are here and some are in the next section.

On JoeMyGod, there were several comment threads memorializing Anne Marie. I know of two, but there are probably others: Overnight Open Thread 1, Overnight Open Thread 2

Reminders of Anne Marie

Throughout the year circumstances or belongings prompted several people to remember Anne Marie. Here is a selection of their posts:

Fearsome and Shawn posted about Anne Marie several times:

Uptonking at Wonderland Burlesque remembered Anne Marie several times as he reviewed alternative recordings of pop songs: Who Did It Better? Swayin’ To The Music (Slow Dancing), Who Did It Better? The Loco-motion

Sixpence dedicated his post Mayor Pete to Anne Marie.

Dr Spo received a posthumous birthday card: Curious things about the house #73

Michael reread one of Anne Marie’s old comments: Three Months Later.

Arteejee Memorials

Of course, this corner of the blogosphere did not just lose Anne Marie. Her husband Todd (aka RTG aka arteejee) died on Jan 25. Todd’s sister-in-law announced his death in the comments of his blog. He was also in poor health, suffered a fall, and then his heart gave out.

There were fewer memorials to Todd, and it is unfair to include them here as opposed to their own post, but that’s the way it goes.

Maddie from A Day With the Mistress Borghese: Arteejee

Sean from Idle Eyes and a Dormy: Unmotivated but moving along

Urspo from Spo-reflections: Spo-reflections on a Saturday Shingles Shot

Respect

Let’s close with some music videos, in the spirit of Saturday Night Dance/Protest Parties.

Although Anne Marie loved much of the music from the 1970s, she disliked ABBA. This has turned into a bit of an in-joke amongst those who remember her. I appreciate the joke but I feel that forever associating Anne Marie with ABBA is unfair. She liked all kinds of music, and if she happened to exercise improper taste with respect to a famous disco group, then so what? There was a lot of other music to choose from.

RTG posted “Time” by the Alan Parsons Symphonic Project a couple of times following Anne Marie’s death. I have been listening to it a lot this year.

Anne Marie posted Aretha Franklin’s “Respect” in one of her final dance parties. It wasn’t 70s disco but reflects how many in the community felt about her:

17 thoughts on “Memorials for Anne Marie

  1. It’s hard to believe it has been a year since her passing. It only seems like a few months. Thanks for posting this memorial.

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    1. This year has felt like a long one to me. 2021 was tough, and 2022 has not been so hot either.

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  2. A beautiful and timely tribute, Old Lurker! I miss Anne Marie and her “take no prisoners” opinions/comments on everything momentous. She was one of a kind alright. I didn’t really get to know her husband Todd until after Anne Marie passed away, and I felt so bad for him. It was clear that he was suffering without her, the love of his life.

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    1. I followed Todd’s blog more closely than Anne Marie’s, and his health issues hit me hard. He was quite politically aware too, but not as outspoken as Warrior Queen. He also appreciated good comedy.

      From the outside, it seems as if they had a strange relationship, but it was a strong one. I feel Todd was trying to move on without AM, but his poor health got the worst of him.

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  3. Oh, Lurkie!
    You’ve made me cry a little. I so miss Anne Marie! We were planning a road trip and were thinking about meeting with many of the bloggers you’ve mentioned. I was totally stoked by the thought of an afternoon of cocktails, Anne Marie and Mistress Maddie. It never happened, though, because she got sick and then passed.
    I LOVED her Saturday Night Party playlists. Have some lined up in my phone. I have a hat and a scarf she knitted for me, too. And I have her comments on my blog.
    Thanks, Lurkie, for writing this.
    Anne Marie, if you’re reading… miss you, girl.

    XOXO

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Nothing stops you from getting together with cocktails and Maddie and other bloggers now. It won’t be the same without Anne Marie but it can still be worthwhile.

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  4. I am still grieving the loss of both Anne Marie and Todd. Thank you for this tribute to them both. I remember that feeling of bad news the moment a year ago when I saw Todd’s phone number come up on my phone. She had been having health issues for a few months, but when he said she was gone I was devastated.

    From what I remember about what he shared he had been hospitalized about two weeks before her death. She was home with the cats as it was the height of Covid isolation and she wasn’t allowed to visit him the hospital. Neither of them had Covid. Her health wasn’t good at the time and she ended up being hospitalized in a different hospital while he was still in his. He was released but not allowed to visit her. She apparently took a turn for the worse and ended up in ICU on a ventilator. The evening before she passed the hospital called him in and allowed her to visit. He said she wasn’t responsive but he held her hand. He then left to go home and feed the cats and he got the call that she was gone. I reassured him that even though she didn’t respond that she knew he was there. He adored her, he was lost without her.

    My recollection may not be totally accurate as I was crying as he shared and the conversation became dreamlike for me in my grief as he shared his, but it was something close to what I have shared above. It was tragic for both of them that the last two weeks of her life they weren’t together and there was just a minimal visit with no ability to have a verbal exchange. As something Anne Marie might have said: “This FUCKING Covid shit Fucking sucks! Fuck Covid for keeping us apart when we needed each other the most. FUCK!”

    Anne Marie if you can read this, I want to say Thank You for sharing you with me, I truly love you.
    Todd if you are reading this, I want to say Thank You for allowing Anne Marie to be just who she is and sharping the love of your life with us.

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    1. Oh dear. I had no idea that they were apart for the last two weeks. That’s makes the situation seem worse.

      Anne Marie had been leaving comments as late as May 25. Had she been in hospital then?

      I hope somebody adopted the cats when Todd died.

      In compiling this post it was abundantly clear that Anne Marie has been in your thoughts a lot. You are a dear.

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      1. From what I understood from Todd she had been in the hospital that week, it was just the last day or so that things got bad so she went on life support and they let him in to see her. I think of them both often.
        I know he had family because I spoke with him every few weeks. He even asked me to teach him how to post videos so he could post the ones he did in her honor. His brother helped him a lot after her passing. I’m sure they got the cats adopted out.

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  5. I think of them often. I have some momentos of hers that remind me and keep her memory – and strengths – going.

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    1. You can remember her every time you go for a pony ride, or when you are crafting a letter to the editor of your local newspaper.

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  6. I once said she acted like my big sister. For ever after that she called me her ‘little bro.’
    A lovely lady.
    JP

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